10 Ways to Help a New Mom | Cup of Jo

This weekend, my pal gave start to a child lady (named Georgie, how cute is that?!). I need to assist her, so I believed again to my own postpartum experiences and browse by reader feedback to work out what to convey and do. Here are 10 methods to assist a new dad or mum…

1. Bring FRESH meals. “We got a lot of freezer meals when our second was born (much appreciated! don’t get me wrong!) and then someone showed up with trays of cut vegetables and fruit, and it was pretty much the BEST, omg,” says Ros. A reader named Molly agrees: “We ate so many heavy casseroles (gleefully, because postpartum hunger is not picky), but an awesome gift is cut-up fruit and veggies.” You might additionally make a Big Salad, says Devorah: “A pre-made salad with dressing on the side. I really wanted salads, but the thought of standing at the counter chopping veggies was exhausting. This can be homemade or picked up from a salad place, that’s fine, too!”

2. You might additionally inventory the fridge. “When we came home with our first baby, our neighbors had stocked our fridge, and I STILL, 11 years later, think about how wonderful it was,” says Amanda. “Juice, deli meat, cheese, bread, fresh fruit, potato salad, chicken salad, soup — to make quick meals anytime of day. Plus, a chocolate cake which might have been the best part.” Side word: If you’re distant, you may also ship bagels. “The BEST gift I got was a gift pack from Russ & Daughters, which included coffee, bagels, cream cheese, smoked salmon and chocolate babka,” writes Jamie. “I savored it!!!”

3. Choose meals you recognize they’ll like. “People are well-meaning when they ask what you’d like to eat, but I was so tired of making decisions,” remembers Joanna. A reader named Naomi agrees: “The day we came home from the hospital, my husband and mother-in-law kept asking me what I wanted for lunch. I was like, make me anything! I cannot make this decision!”

4. Bring tender pajamas and/or a gown. “My mother-in-law gave me cotton pajamas and the softest, lightest robe,” says K.. “I LIVED in that robe and secretly loved that it was just for me because in the beginning, it’s all about the baby.” Bonus: Consider washing them first. Says Megan: “My mom brought me comfy new pajamas that she already washed in baby-safe detergent! Taking that extra step was so amazing because as a first-time mom I was very paranoid about my baby’s sensitive skin.”

5. Or contemplate a set of recent new underwear. “That’s all I wanted,” writes Joetta. “During pregnancy, I stretched all mine out. Pretty undies made me feel like myself again.”

6. Offer to keep OR depart. New dad and mom might want to be alone or crave firm, so comply with their lead. “My coworker was on maternity leave, and one day I was in her neighborhood,” remembers Cynthia. “I stopped by a deli, bought two sandwiches and drinks, and texted her that I would drop by in five minutes and could stay for a few minutes or go. When she opened the door, she burst into tears. The spontaneous lunch and half hour of work gossip was the best thing that had happened to her all week.” Also, contemplate the timing. “If you can duck out of work early, time your visit for a weeknight, an hour or two before your friend’s partner gets home from work (i.e., the hardest two hours of the day during maternity leave!),” says Maggie. Replies Joy: “Oh, this is so brilliant. I was such a clockwatcher by 4 p.m. when I was home on leave.”

7. Roll up your sleeves and sort out any chores you’ll be able to see. When Toby was a new child, my pal Abbey came to visit and, unprompted, did all our dishes, and I bear in mind weeping from the kindness. “Take out the trash. Walk the dog. Don’t ask to hold the baby unless she offers. Listen to her,” says Jordan. Throw in a load of laundry, or fold tiny onesies. “Best thing anyone did was walk into my house and put a fresh set of sheets on my bed. Heaven,” writes Whitney. And take one thing away whenever you depart: “Empty the diaper genie, take out the trash, clear out old newspapers, anything,” says Chelsea. And contemplate out of doors family duties, if there are any. “We had a preemie in the NICU for 10 weeks,” says Heidi. “Our neighbor had her lawn service to do our lawn, as well. It was so nice to know there was one less household thing to have to worry about.”

8. Listen to her start story. “Give her time to share her story in her own way,” says Sarah. “Don’t compare your story to hers. Don’t give her platitudes. Just be there. Help her process the magnitude of what just happened.”

9. Play with the older little one, if there may be one. “When my daughter was born, the kindest thing that our friends did was take our energetic three-year-old to the playground,” says Aly. “Getting to be alone with the baby felt downright relaxing! And if you don’t know the older kid well, entertaining them with toys for an hour in their room is good as gold.”

10. Finally, proceed to examine in for the primary few months (or 12 months). “Our friends and family were so generous in the early days, but as I sit here tired, bleary eyed, and unshowered, with an almost-two-month-old and a three-and-a-half-year-old, I am wishing for help in these slightly later days,” says Cassie. “Could someone bring us dinner tomorrow? Or come hold the baby while I clean my bedroom? Or take our toddler to the park? This is not to say that help in the early days is not appreciated, but rather to note that sometimes it’s nice to be remembered when it ‘seems’ like you should have have adjusted and don’t need the unexpected meal or visit.”

What would you add? If you might have a little one, what helped throughout these early days? Congratulations to any new dad and mom or parents-to-be, and likewise a heartfelt word and acknowledgement of those that try, wishing and ready. xoxo

P.S. Five gifts for new moms, and “why formula feeding was best for us.”

(Photo of a mom holding her new child child by Tatiana Timofeeva/Stocksy.)

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